Friday, May 8, 2009

To the casual observer this is nothing more than a tired farm implement whiling away its last days as the branches of a nearby tree attempt to obscure it from view. Au contraire; in the proper hands this bad boy can sling five-hundreds pounds of manure in the blink of an eye. You say, “But Dan, between the two houses of Congress we already have 535 professional versions, why do we need more?” And to that I can only respond, “Good question.”

But due to an acute state of boredom I decided to compile a list of characteristics for each. (Due to posting issues I am unable to do a side to side comparison with columns. It will make much more sense if you read an item number from one category and the coresponding item under the other category).

Manure Spreader
1. Sales pitch accurately depicts merchandise
2. Can be openly purchased at auction
3. Superior customer satisfaction rating
4. Sits idle a good portion of the year
5. Quite adept at spewing poo
6. Pulled behind a tractor

Elected Official
1. Is this even the same guy I voted for?
2. Will openly auction his purchase
3. Sketchy; see ability to be purchased
4. Same
5. Same
6. Not a bad idea

* The views and generally piss-poor attitude depicted in this article may not reflect the view of the blog owner, but in this case they do.


Jo A. T.B. said...

Loved your adept observations Dan, living out here in farm country I can certainly relate and strongly agree. You forgot they can both spread it pretty thick!

Jo Janoski said...

Oh, this is great, and so accurate! Oops! DUCK! One of those politicians is gonna blow! Must be an election day coming up...

Scott Clawson said...

* The views and generally piss-poor attitude depicted in this article may not reflect the view of the blog reader, but in this case they do.

Good one Dan! :0)

Shirley said...

Haha! You've outdone yourself... not only true but witty as well! We should try dragging one (politician) around the backyard and see if the grass gets greener!

punatik said...

An excellent observation Dan.

Angel C. said...

:) Love it! Having grown up on a farm and seen one of those in action many of times, I can definately see the relation!! The view also reflects the view of this blog reader also!

terrymcdermott said...

Great post! I have not been around,just trying to catch up.

CordieB said...

Hey Dan, just checking in to say hello. Hoping all is well, C.